Week 40

I made it. Today is my due date.

The baby is the size of a pumpkin. There’s a freakin pumpkin in there, yall.

No makeup, no hair – don’t care. This is what you get at FORTY WEEKS pregnant.  Remind me one day that I swear to G-d never to ask a pregnant woman how she’s feeling, how she is, or if she’s had the baby yet.  Every time someone asks me, I picture launching myself at them and pinning them to the ground and growling in their ear, “I’m fucking miserable, what do you think?” – I don’t do that, though.  But I no longer respond to text messages or emails asking me these things, because if I did, it’s all I would get done all day – seriously.  It’s nice that people care, but honestly – it’s just safe to assume each day is more miserable than the one before it til the baby comes.  Also, coworkers – I’ll never ask if you’re “still here,” as in, in the office. Because you’re obviously still here if I’m looking at you asking if you’re still here.

My new auto-reply: www.haveyouhadthatbabyyet.com

Total Weight Gain: 26-27 pounds, fluctuating. Who cares at this point?

Weekly Workouts: SO MUCH WALKING. SO MUCH. I’m trying to walk her out. I hit double digit mileage this weekend alone.

Maternity Clothes: I can barely fit my regular work pants on with the Bella Band – good thing I start leave tomorrow.

Sleep: Only woke up once on Saturday night, which is a recent record! But then last night it was about 5 times again. Boo.

Best Moment of the Week: Don’t judge me if I say it was binge-watching Orange is the New Black. I didn’t do too much this past week.

Food cravings: Sweets. And Vietnamese food is still doing it for me. YUM. Who can I talk into Huynh this week?

Food aversions: Nothing right now, except sometimes I’m hungry and nothing sounds good. Weird.

Symptoms: Still having mild sciatica and carpal tunnel.

Movement: She is out of room but when she kicks me, it hurts – she is strong.

“At 40 weeks pregnant, this is the moment your baby (and you) has been waiting for! Now officially full-term, a baby born this week will weigh in the neighborhood of seven and a half pounds and measure anywhere from 19 to 22 inches. But many babies check in smaller or bigger than this and are both perfect and perfectly healthy.

The first thing you’re likely to look for when baby makes his or her dramatic (and possibly fashionably late) entrance: proof positive that he is actually a he, or she is actually a she. That major mystery solved once and for all, you’ll also notice that baby (besides being cute as can be — and yours!) is wearing a little leftover travel dust, consisting of blood, vernix, lanugo, and amniotic fluid. From your baby’s perspective, you’ll look a bit blurry (babies at birth can focus only about an inch away), but that’s okay. With all the tears of joy you’ll probably be shedding, your baby will look a little blurry to you too.

You’ll notice your little one is still curled into the fetal position (though his or her arms and legs may flail a bit). That’s because after nine months in such cramped quarters, it’ll take a while before your baby realizes that he or she has room to spread out. And because it’s the only position he or she has really known, it’s a comforting one to be in. (That’s also why so many newborns like to be swaddled, it reminds them of your uterus.)

Be sure to say hello to your new arrival. Your baby is very likely to recognize the sound of your voice — and that of your partner.” – What to Expect (www.whattoexpect.com)

Gender: GIRL – well, that’s what we’re told. Guess we’ll find out, right??

What I’m Looking Forward To: HAVING A BABY.

What I Miss: Running. Drinking. Sleeping without having my body fall asleep. Tying my shoes. Painting my toenails. Riding a bike.

Next Appointment: November 13th

Estimated due date is November 11th?!?!