Read Vol. 1, Vol. 2, or Vol. 3.
Let’s be real for a second – being knocked up is hard. It’s extremely taxing on your body and emotions. While I’ve had a REALLY easy pregnancy – no morning sickness, minimal fatigue, zero stretch marks to date (knock wood) – it’s still hard. I’m not trying to rub in the fact that I had a really easy pregnancy, just acknowledge that I know I’m lucky, ok? But that doesn’t make me any less miserable at this point – it’s all relative. And we all know how long it takes to cook a baby, but the reality is…hello, you are pregnant for almost a year. A YEAR. Do you know how much happens in a year?! I know you do.
I’ve tried to be really good about not complaining too much, since I know it can be insufferable (almost as insufferable as the people who tell you every.detail. of their pregnancy) but I’ve reached my limit. And when I meet the people who just LOVED EVERY SECOND OF BEING PREGNANT, I’m like…what are you even TALKING about?? Are we on the same planet? I’m extremely excited to start our family. But I do not enjoy being pregnant. The baby? I love her. Pregnant? Not so much. Shane is definitely going to carry the next one!
If I had a dollar for every time somebody asked me how I’m feeling, I would be RICH AS BALLS and would therefore feel FRIGGIN AMAZING. Can we make that a rule? Now it costs $1 to ask me how I’m feeling.
If one more person comments on how miserable or uncomfortable I must be, I’ll probably burst into tears because yes, I am miserable and uncomfortable and thank you for bringing that up.
The one fun thing is sharing all the TMI facts about pregnancy and labor with my friends and watching the fear and horror on their faces, the same fear and horror I’m sure I had on mine when I learned all this stuff. It’s comical, really. If there is one piece of advice I could give you, it would be to never EVER under any circumstances google “mucus plug.” Just don’t. You can thank me later. YOU JUST GOOGLED IT, DIDN’T YOU? You sicko.
So friends, there’s still no baby – less than one week from my due date. I can hold on for another week but I hope I don’t have to. Told you my doctor’s predictions suck – 48 hours, my ass. A week later, here we are. I have been having super strong contractions the past 24 hours but of course trying not to get too excited.
Baby, you only have a few days left – please vacate the premises. Everybody is anxious to meet you – especially your mom and dad!